Shock revelation over Clinton campaign co-ordinator

Commentators have been shocked to discover that Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign had a co-ordinator, after Mark Penn resigned from the role over the weekend. Penn, a freelance political strategist who has apparently been advising the Clintons since the 1990s, stepped down after it was revealed he had met the Colombian ambassador to discuss a free-trade pact that Clinton opposes. "Wow," said visibly surprised New York Times political reporter John Broder. "You mean all that lurching from crisis to crisis, and ceding a seemingly unassailable lead in the polls to Obama was planned?" "You know, you see a campaign reacting to headlines and making gaffe after gaffe without any semblance of purpose," added Wall Street Journal reporter Jackie Calmes. "I guess I was just unaware it was co-ordinated at all." Penn refused to comment on the resignation, but said that his next venture will be co-ordinating alcoholic drinking strategies at US breweries.