Teenager attempts to become youngest round-the-world yachtsman

Plucky teenager George Osborne set sail from Westminster on Saturday in a bid to become the youngest person to sail solo around Corfu. George, 16, was waved off by scores of family, friends and other well-wishers as he began the gruelling voyage. The young yachtsman said he was nervous, excited and "a little crazy" to do what he was doing at his age. His best friend, Dave Cameron, 16½, said the Conservative Party would really miss him. "Piss off, George," he said, waving happily. "Don't come back," he added.

Public anger as posh person breaks posh people's rules

There was widespread fury today as new details of the so-called "poshgate" affair emerged. Receptionist, Monica Richards, 35, is one member of the public who says she is appalled by recent events. "I am absolutely disgusted by this whole business. These posh people just can't go repeating conversations they've had on their billionaire host's yacht to the press. It's a serious error of judgment. All my friends agree it's a crass miscalculation," she said this morning. The mother of two added, conspiratorially: "Not really blue blooded, apparently. Dreadful manners." The aristocracy was tonight unavailable for comment.