Respect Party not aware of terror attacks, claims to have been under the weather

A spokesman for Respect has apologised for the failure to condemn last week's terror attacks in London and Glasgow on the party's official website, claiming that they had not been aware of the attempted bombings. "To be honest, we've all had a touch of flu," he said. Asked why party leader George Galloway has not referred to the events on his website either, the spokesman added, "George has not had time to update his site as he has been exceptionally busy admiring his new salt-and-pepper beard."